The Return (The Ark Episode 3)

The one where the Monoids have become humanity's overlords...

I find it really jarring when a writer allows a word or phrase particular to them to infect their characters. Writer Paul Erickson (for his wife, Lesley Scott, had next to nothing to do with the writing of this story, despite being credited) uses the somewhat clumsy phrase "kind of" three times in this one episode alone, and it smarts every time I hear them: "It looks like some kind of kitchen," observes Steven, followed swiftly by "looked like some kind of gun". Later, Dodo says: "It's a sort of a castle", and even the Monoids get in on the act when Monoid Three asks Monoid One: "You mean a bomb of some kind?" ARGH!

Pedantic writerly rant over. Now, what of the story proper? Well, the TARDIS has taken (indeed, Steven says it "decided" to take) its crew 700 years forward in time to the very end of the ark's journey to Refusis, but in a major twist it seems in that time the Monoids have staged a revolution against the Guardians, and are now their masters. Monoid One is the leader and waddles around with a haughty, self-important air, all camp sweeping gestures and violent tantrums. The Monoids also seem to have developed mouths, because they can now speak (thanks to some cheap-looking translation collars) and appear to fully enjoy solid fruits as well as liquids (in cut-glass goblets, naturally!).

It's only now that the Monoids as a design show their flaws. As mute orderlies, they looked sufficiently odd and alien (I've still not quite gotten over the sheer strangeness of seeing a Monoid examine a monitor lizard's underside in The Plague!), but now they have taken a more active part in the narrative, complete with That's Obviously Roy Skelton voices and moving around with their "kind of" guns, they start to look silly. All the arm-flailing and conversational poses turns the aesthetic design into something really rather preposterous (perfectly demonstrated by the scene when the Doctor, Monoid Two, Yendom and Dodo enter the Refusian castle, and Monoid actor Ralph Carrigan stumbles down the doorstep!). I genuinely did not think they were silly in episodes 1 and 2.

The Monoids do come across as a dependable threat though, despite their gait. They have weapons which they never put down, and they have the few remaining Guardians locked up in their Security Kitchen (sorry, their what?!), slaving over bowls of water as they make new potatoes out of dissolvable tablets. It's not exactly hard labour, but it's certainly mundane. Also, seven whole centuries have passed since we were last on the ark, but next to nothing seems to have changed in that time. The control room looks the same, and the Guardians haven't updated their skimpy fashions either. They still opt for ribbon curtains, underpants and flip-flops (and when the Guardian is killed by the Monoid in the kitchen, very little is left to the viewer's imagination - indeed, if The Ark was in HD, we'd be able to make out the price label on the soul of his flip-flops!).

The episode moves along at a fair pace, with the Doctor, Steven and Dodo getting the lowdown on how this revolution came about thanks to a clearly very boastful Monoid One, who calls the Guardians "simple" (he's not wrong). I love the parting glare William Hartnell gives to the Monoid leader when he's marched off to the Security Kitchen, as if the Doctor is expressing his joint disgust and disappointment with what's happened.

The special effects are pretty good too, whether it's the cross-fade effect for the food pills, the physical effects of the invisible Refusians, or the launcher flying through space towards Refusis (it's a simple model effect, but one which puts me in mind of the shot of the Tantive IV's escape pod falling toward Tatooine from Star Wars: A New Hope, which was obviously done on a much greater budget, and a decade later).

It appears (or rather, doesn't appear) that the native Refusians are invisible. Well actually, they can't be seen or touched, thanks to the bafflingly unexplained effect of a solar flare catastrophe which rendered them without shape or form, with "no being you can see or recognise". So they're not exactly invisible, just non-corporeal. They can be present in a room, and are somehow able to vocalise, as well as touch and affect physical objects like chairs and doors. So they're not invisible as such, they're just not there. Although they are there. It's confusing, so let's not dwell too much on the hows and whys (after all, the production team didn't). That aside, having yet another invisible race of aliens so soon after The Daleks' Master Plan's Visians feels weak. But then, I suppose most of the budget had been spent on the design of everything else.

A quick mention of Dodo here. Jackie Lane is still managing to make the cheeky orphan as characterful as she can, shining particularly well when Dodo rumbles the Monoids' plan to destroy the humans. She gives Monoid Two both barrels: "Are you up to something? You gave yourself away, didn't you? I've got a feeling when the time comes you're not going to bring the Guardians down here at all, is that it? I'm right, aren't I?" To be fair, Monoid Two is particularly dense when he lets slip the plan, even saying: "Errrr... no..." when Dodo catches him out. Superb and awful at the same moment!

By the end of the episode, the Refusians have rather mercilessly blown up the launcher with Monoid Two inside, and the Doctor and Dodo are stranded on Refusis. "We shall just have to stay here," says the Doctor, somewhat cheerily. He's behaving very calmly about the possibility of being stranded for the rest of his days and regenerations on a planet full of invisible pyromaniacs, with a young girl who he says can't speak proper English!

By the way, The Return has to be the dullest episode title ever. It tells you absolutely nothing except for the fact there's a return somewhere (and that happened last week!).

First broadcast: March 19th 1966

Steve's Scoreboard
The Good: The whole gear-change in the narrative is invigorating. It would be wonderful to have this much invention in every story to keep them all (particularly the longer serials) fast-paced and engaging. Oh, and I'm in totes love with Terence Woodfield as Maharis. He's so handsome and sweet!
The Bad: The Monoids become silly as soon as they subjugate and speak, sadly. It would also have been better if Erickson had given the speaking Monoids individual names, as I am sure the power-grabbing overlords would have done themselves.
Overall score for episode: ★★★★★★★★☆☆

NEXT TIME: The Bomb...

My reviews of this story's other episodes: The Steel Sky (episode 1); The Plague (episode 2); The Bomb (episode 4)

Find out birth/death dates, career information, and facts and trivia about this story's cast and crew at the Doctor Who Cast & Crew site: http://doctorwhocastandcrew.blogspot.co.uk/2013/10/the-ark.html

The Ark is available on DVD. Find it on Amazon - https://www.amazon.co.uk/Doctor-Who-Ark-William-Hartnell/dp/B004EPYSAU/