The Final Test (The Celestial Toymaker Episode 4)

The one where Steven and Dodo play TARDIS hopscotch with Billy Bunter...

At last I'm able to see the imaginative set and costume design of The Celestial Toymaker, although obviously not in colour, as the beautiful set photos are. Daphne Dare and John Wood really excelled themselves on this story, creating the fantasy world of the Toymaker with brash and colourful skill. The design of the story is probably the best thing about it, but it's also frustrating that the sole surviving episode is the only one not to feature the wonderful Campbell Singer and Carmen Silvera. The Final Test doesn't really demonstrate Dare and Wood's work adequately either.

John Wood's set design is particularly reminiscent of those episodes of The Avengers which pit the female star against a diabolical mastermind in a house of traps. It's one of the most memorable Avengers episodes, whichever version of it you remember or prefer (Don't Look Behind You, The House That Jack Built, The Joker), and the Swinging 60s day-glo design of the swirling dice indicator, the reflective walls and the toy robots could have been influenced by Harry Pottle's design work on The House That Jack Built, which debuted in the UK on March 4th, 1966 - two weeks before The Celestial Toymaker's first episode went into studio.

I do miss Singer and Silvera, but to be fair to Peter Stephens - who has failed to impress me in his fleeting earlier appearances in this story - he's actually pretty good as schoolboy Cyril (his friends call him Billy, which certainly pricked up the ears of the Frank Richards estate!). Cyril makes for a pretty respectable adversary, and certainly manages to run rings round the otherwise rather naive Dodo.

Cyril repeatedly tries to make Steven and Dodo lose, either by making Dodo jump with a gorilla mask, tricking Dodo into missing a turn by pretending he's injured (to be honest, she deserved it - she was very stupid to fall for that one!) or spreading a "slippery powder" on the hopscotch board to cause his opponents to fall to their death. This last trick is ultimately Cyril's downfall as he slips off the board and gets fried on the electrified floor. His demise is pretty gruesome, and we even get a lingering shot of the charred remains of a wooden toy Cyril in his original form. One trick Cyril doesn't seem to employ though - even though it may seem so at the time - is making the rules of TARDIS hopscotch up as he goes along. He never admits to it, and if he did cheat, he'd also fall victim to the Toymaker's invisible barrier, as Steven does when he tries to hop ahead. Yes, the rules are supposed to be that frustrating!

A word about Steven (other than my perfectly innocent observation that his clothes are very figure-hugging here...) - he's so violent in this story! Writer Brian Hayles portrays Steven as a short-tempered, fist-flying ruffian - Steven was very keen on a scuffle with Sergeant Rugg in The Dancing Floor, and also threatened Cyril at the end of that episode ("You'll feel my hand in a minute!"). In this episode he utters the immortal line: "I'm going to see if there's any invisible barrier around his backside" in reference to Cyril, and once confronted with the smug Toymaker, goes to throw a punch at him! It seems Steven really needs to get something out of his system!

The Final Test also sees the physical return of William Hartnell as the Doctor, after two weeks of being invisible and mute. In his absence we've had Albert Ward (one half of the music hall act Albert and Les Ward) doubling as the Doctor's disembodied hand, as well as a rubber prop, seen quite prominently in one shot! Hartnell instantly lifts the production with his twinkly presence, and finally Michael Gough gets to act against somebody rather than just recite lines to nothing and nobody.

The Toymaker, who the Doctor has earlier described as a "power for evil", offers his adversary the power to corrupt and destroy. We also learn that he is immortal, and has lasted thousands of years. He also likes to be entertained by lesser mortals, so is he something to do with the Eternals, who we meet much later in Enlightenment? It would make sense. Or is he something to do with the Gods of Ragnarok from The Greatest Show in the Galaxy, who exist in their Dark Circus to be entertained? The Doctor says he has fought the Gods "all through time", which would tally with his statement in The Final Test that his fight against the Toymaker isn't over: "There will be other meetings in another time".

The way by which the Doctor defeats the Toymaker totally befuddles me. The TARDIS cannot leave the celestial domain until the Doctor has played his final move of the Trilogic Game, but as soon as he does, the domain will disappear, and everything in it with it (including the TARDIS). The Doctor gets round this by imitating the Toymaker's voice to make the final move, even though the final move is supposed to be the Doctor's. The garbled explanation goes like so:

DOCTOR: When the Toymaker wanted to move the pieces, he had to command them in a certain tone of voice to make them move at all.
DODO: But you had to do it twice.
DOCTOR: Yes, but in the first place, you see, I couldn't, because I used my own voice.
DODO: I don't see.
STEVEN: I do. The Toymaker wasn't playing.
DOCTOR: Exactly, dear boy, exactly. Therefore, I had to imitate the Toymaker's voice to make them obey me, and they did.

Huh? It may make sense to someone out there, but certainly not me. The last move was the Doctor's, so why does he need to imitate the Toymaker to make that move? Surely whichever voice is used to make Move 1,023 is irrelevant - the Toymaker's domain will still disappear, and the TARDIS with it?

Never mind. At least the climax of this story is in keeping with the rest of the serial - disappointing and tedious. The Celestial Toymaker could have been a real classic of the era, with its memorable production design and array of colourful characters. But it's directed by Bill Sellars with an almost insatiable disinterest, and Brian Hayles's writing (whether rewritten by others or not) lacks sparkle and wit. And there's an unforgivable waste of an otherwise excellent guest star, a guest star who is Michael Gough no less! I mean, come on... it's like the Doctor Who production team just aren't concentrating...

First broadcast: April 23rd 1966

Steve's Scoreboard
The Good: I love those toy robot props with the little monitors in. I want one.
The Bad: The climax is a jumbled, incoherent cop-out.
Overall score for episode: ★★★★☆☆☆☆☆☆ (story average: 4.5 out of 10)

NEXT TIME: A Holiday for the Doctor...

My reviews of this story's other episodes: The Celestial Toyroom (episode 1); The Hall of Dolls (episode 2); The Dancing Floor (episode 3)

Find out birth/death dates, career information, and facts and trivia about this story's cast and crew at the Doctor Who Cast & Crew site: http://doctorwhocastandcrew.blogspot.co.uk/2013/10/the-celestial-toymaker.html

The soundtrack to The Celestial Toymaker is available on BBC CD. Find it on Amazon - https://www.amazon.co.uk/Doctor-Who-Celestial-Brian-Hayles/dp/0563478551. The existing episode 4, The Final Test, can be found on the Lost in Time DVD set - https://www.amazon.co.uk/Doctor-Who-Lost-Time-DVD/dp/B0002XOZW4