The Underwater Menace Episode 3

The one where we're subjected to a laborious underwater ballet...

When it was only this episode which survived of the four, it's easy to understand why The Underwater Menace had such a poor reputation. Where episodes 1 and 2 build the story nicely, albeit with lashings of B-movie trappings, this third episode really pulls out all the stops in an effort to be as strange, bizarre, alienating and laughable as possible. It's not really an accurate representation of the story so far in tone and style.

Although his performance as Professor Zaroff never started off anywhere near subtle, here Joseph Furst cranks his crackpot up to 11 on the Bonkers Scale, giving the madman a swivel-eyed, Bond villain vibe which really does not match everybody else's performances. While all about him are treating the text as seriously as they can (or ought), Furst is chewing the scenery as if it's his last meal. His diction leaves a lot to be desired too, which is more unfortunate when you realise it's Furst's real accent, not put on...

At least those around him acknowledge his madness though, with the Doctor warning that Zaroff is a desperate man, and a wonderful little moment where Noel Johnson's King Thous sees in Zaroff's glassy stare the maniac the Doctor warned him about in episode 2. And then there's that triumphant cliffhanger, where Furst delivers the immortal line: "Nuzzink in ze vorld can stop me now!"

Zaroff's desperation to demonstrate his supremacy as a scientist manifests in quite violent ways too. He shoots Thous down in cold blood at point-blank range, then orders his guards to do the same to the King's men, who are killed swiftly off-camera. Earlier in the episode, Zaroff murders poor Ramo by spearing him with a trident, and man-handles Polly by roughly shoving and pulling her around. Maybe it's Furst's enthusiasm, but the way he pushes Anneke Wills into that giant golden pot seems a little overzealous to me.

I do like how Ben and Polly orchestrate the Doctor and Ramo's escape from sacrifice by pretending to be the manifestation of the goddess Amdo, giving voice to the deity and pulling the wool tightly over Lolem and his acolytes' eyes. It's amusing when Lolem believes the Doctor and Ramo have been "eaten up" by Amdo, when all they've really done is get up and sneak out! I have to say, I love Peter Stephens' Lolem, who's as camp as a box of feather boas. Stephens' snippy delivery makes for a delightful tête-à-tête between Lolem (religion) and Zaroff (science). "May the wrath of Amdo engulf you!" spits Lolem, to which the crazed Zaroff retorts: "I'll take my chance, now get out!"

The Doctor's rather flimsy plan this week (he even admits it won't get them very far, but that "it's a start") is to provoke industrial action among the Fish People, the genetically modified slaves who farm the seafood that feeds the population of Atlantis. These Fish People must be particularly thick (they must have lobotomies to make space for their plastic gills!) because they've never realised before how important and vital they are to the smooth operation of Atlantis. Seafood only lasts a few hours before going off, and without the Fish People to provide a constant supply of fresh food, the people would starve. The Fish People are treated as slaves, we're told, but it takes a rather cocky Irishman to point out the power they have to force them into action.

They're a wet lot, aren't they? When Sean teases and goads them, they burble loudly and shake their fists at him, and when he laughs at them, they hurl seashells at him (actually that could hurt a bit!). But when they agree to go on strike, the first thing they do is indulge in a bizarre underwater ballet like something out of an Esther Williams movie. It's all done on wires of course, with the actors moving in slow motion, and the camera filming it all through the prism of a fish tank lens. I admire director Julia Smith's creativity in staging the sequence, but ultimately it leaves you thinking: What's it for? It's accompanied by Dudley Simpson's eccentric electronic score, which is essentially a nice composition, but perhaps not so great played on an electronic organ, complete with parps and squiggles. The "action" is also a little dull. The Fish People could have been more active and choreographed, rather than just bobbing about, in and out of shot. There's evidence of choreography, but it all seems a bit lame - as do the appropriately named Juanita Waterson's costumes for the Fish People, which are the sort of thing you'd find on stage at a primary school end-of-term play.

A lot of the action takes place in the market, where the Doctor yet again gets to dress up (notice the sonic shades, decades before Peter Capaldi had them - but 12 months after the Meddling Monk!) and Polly dons skimpy Atlantean clothes because... well, just because she likes the spiral shell headgear, I suppose. Far more interesting for this viewer is that Jamie and Ben dress as Zaroff's guards, in full rubber wet suits. I'll just leave that observation here, and move on...

Episode 3 of The Underwater Menace is a wildly camp affair, with an OTT villain, ridiculous costumes, crazy music and a truly bizarre and unnecessary dance break. There's no other episode of Doctor Who quite like it. It's wonderful but it's awful, all at the same time!

First broadcast: January 28th, 1967

Steve's Scoreboard
The Good: I like the Gregorian-style chanting of the acolytes in Lolem's temple. It's both amusing and faintly threatening!
The Bad: The water ballet. I admire the idea, but the finished result wasn't worthwhile at all!
Overall score for episode: ★★★★★☆☆☆☆☆

NEXT TIME: Episode 4...

My reviews of this story's other episodes: Episode 1; Episode 2; Episode 4

Find out birth/death dates, career information, and facts and trivia about this story's cast and crew at the Doctor Who Cast & Crew site: http://doctorwhocastandcrew.blogspot.co.uk/2013/12/the-underwater-menace.html

The Underwater Menace is available on BBC DVD. Find it on Amazon - https://www.amazon.co.uk/Doctor-Who-Underwater-Menace-DVD/dp/B00URM3EWW