Paradise Towers Part Two

The one where Mel is attacked by flesh-eating pensioners with toasting forks...

At the start of the episode we are reminded what Paradise Towers looks like on the outside: a gleaming glassy edifice and a far cry from the dingy interiors we're witnessing. It should have been made to look rundown on the outside as well as the inside, perhaps with smashed windows or wallscrawl. It makes me wonder what is on the outside though, and why everyone stays indoors. Could it be the mysterious war the in-betweens went off to wage?

Now paired with Pex, Mel wanders around the corridors of Paradise Towers with very little direction. She's trying to find the swimming pool on the roof, where she agreed she'd meet the Doctor if they got split up, but struggles to make progress. Along the way she witnesses Pex vandalise a lamp, and meets the Blue Kangs, who fill her in on exactly why Pex seems to be the only in-between around.

The other in-betweens - presumably everyone between the ages of 16 and 60 - sent the young ones and the old ones to Paradise Towers for safety, before going off to war. The young ones have become the Kangs (girl street gangs) and the old ones the Rezzies (residents), while the Caretakers, well... take care of the building (badly). This also suggests the in-betweens took all of the male infants with them to war! Pex was afraid to fight, however, and hid away to stay behind, allocating himself as vigilante and protector, probably through guilt.

It's a nice bit of character development for Pex, who is hopelessly teased by the Kangs ("Scaredy cat!"), and he's obviously ashamed of himself. Is Pex a conscientious objector, a pacifist, or merely a coward? It's a choice for the viewer, but whatever the truth of the matter is, there's room for development if Pex can be allowed to redeem himself (let's face it, the story's wide open for it).

Meanwhile, the Doctor is the Chief Caretaker's prisoner, and has been sentenced to a 327 appendix 3 subsection 9 death (whatever that may be; apparently it's "not a pretty way to go"). This scene, where the Doctor outwits his captors with the slyness of a wily old fox, is magnificent, and immortalises how I think of the Seventh Doctor. Sylvester McCoy is wonderful, nicely understated (his forte) and perfectly in rhythm with the piece. This is where his Doctor is fully crowned, using that old trick of turning the enemy's strengths against them, turning it into a weakness.

Accompanied by another of Keff McCulloch's beautiful melancholy spins on the Doctor Who theme, the Doctor pretends to find a rule in the Caretakers' rulebook which allows him to craftily escape. McCoy is bang on throughout, pinning Clive Merrison with dark, brooding glares, or railing against the restrictions of the rules ("I'd hate to have to live my life by some boring old rulebook like you do. You must get fed up!"). The Doctor pretends to find a rule pertaining to those awaiting his manner of execution, and double bluffs his captors by saying he wouldn't want them to adhere to it. "I don't really expect you to do it," he says, "... but it is in there." And he points to the rulebook, almost threateningly.

It's a wonderful - perhaps the best ever - escape ruse by the Doctor, who gets the Caretakers to walk five paces away, put their hands on their heads and close their eyes, and because he says it's in the rulebook, they do it. The Doctor then pickpockets the door keycards (and his brolly!) and makes his ingenious escape, even giving away what he's up to as he goes: "... About a minute and a half. You see, that's how long the prisoner needs... To find the keycard to the door and escape." And in moments, he's gone, doffing his hat as he goes. Classic Doctor Who, and a surefire contender for the Seventh Doctor's greatest moment.

Sadly, for the rest of the episode the Doctor is cantering about corridors - silhouetted beautifully by lighting director Henry Barber in front of an arch window at one point - looking for Mel. After an aborted encounter with two killer Cleaners, he tumbles with panto-like subtlety into the Red Kangs' brainquarters, where he rallies them to his cause and introduces them to the ice hot splendour of fizzade, using the Kroagnon coins he obtained from a talkyphone. It's a nice bonding sequence, but McCoy lets himself down with garbled delivery. He has a tendency to try to engender urgency by rushing his lines, but the result is his words are indistinct and muddled. Mind you, when it comes to words like "auditoryarchitectatonicalmetrasyncocity", he's a dab hand!

There's one scene which is abominably poor, bargain-basement children's TV fare which brings the rest of the episode down. It involves Richard Briers, a cracking choice for guest actor but who isn't pitching his performance right at all. Did he think he was on Crackerjack or Metal Mickey? And if so, why did the director not have a quiet word*? The scene where the Chief Caretaker visits his "pet" in the basement is embarrassingly written and performed. His beloved pet is represented by a couple of neon tubes in the shape of eyes, and a booming voice insisting it is "Hun-gree!" all the time. Briers is really bad here, kow-towing to the "creature" (his "darling") and referring to himself as its "daddy". The whole thing makes me feel queasy.

Tailing the episode is Mel's return to Tabby and Tilda's flat, and another of their filling afternoon teas. However, this time the old crones refuse to let Mel leave, trapping her under a shawl and poking a toasting fork at her face. Bonnie Langford screams her heart out (startling my dog Toby, who was fast asleep on the sofa!) in a cliffhanger that drew complaints from viewers concerned about its graphic, 'copyable' nature (had they not seen Season 22?). The fact Tabby and Tilda are cannibals ("Nowadays you have to take what you can find") is dealt with so much more subtly than it was in The Two Doctors, which was in-yer-face visceral about it. There are kids watching (even at 7.55pm), so it's better to tone down the blood and guts and have a bit of fun with it - make the kids' sweet little granny a flesh-eating cannibal instead!

* The fact is he did, after producer John Nathan-Turner expressed concern that Briers was overacting. However, Briers, backed by co-star Clive Merrison, insisted that the only way to play a megalomaniac was to go over the top. "I think I nearly lost the job," Briers said on the DVD making-of. "I think he thought I was sending it up, but I was simply overacting." I believe Briers was wrong: just imagine how much better it might have been had original choice Ian Richardson been cast.

First broadcast: October 12th, 1987

Steve's Scoreboard
The Good: Sylvester McCoy is marvellous in the scene where the Doctor escapes the Caretakers.
The Bad: Richard Briers and the neon eyes. That scene alone loses the episode a star.
Overall score for episode: ★★★★★★★☆☆☆

Ace says "Professor": 0

NEXT TIME: Part Three...

My reviews of this story's other episodes: Part One; Part Three; Part Four

Find out birth/death dates, career information, and facts and trivia about this story's cast and crew at the Doctor Who Cast & Crew site.

Paradise Towers is available on BBC DVD. Find it on Amazon - https://www.amazon.co.uk/Doctor-Who-Paradise-Towers-DVD/dp/B004VRO84M